I was thinking about the way my friends have reacted to me trying to lose weight and actually losing weight this past month. It has been interesting to see the difference in my fat friends vs. my thin friends. My fat friends say things like this: "You will never be thin, you are just a big girl." " You are so healthy, maybe you are just supposed to be heavy." "You are beautiful just the way you are."
What my fat friends say when faced with temptation: "Having just one won't hurt." "Come on you've been good all week, you deserve a treat." "You only live once right?"
Are they saying these things to me or are they really trying to convince themselves it's okay? Do they miss me being their partner in crime? (We all know that eating double stuffed Oreo's almost is a criminal act.) Do they hate that the changes I am making make them have to re evaluate there own choices? Are they afraid I will actually lose weight this time and they won't have the fat friend to make them feel better about being fat themselves? Who knows, but they are not too helpful.
The thin ones are the helpful ones right? Um, no. They are the ones saying: "Just eat less and exercise more and you will look like me." "Try portion control, I think that's why I never had a weight problem." "You need to have more will power."
What my thin friends say when I am eating with them: "Should you be eating that?" "Is that on your diet plan?" "Yes you are having veggies but they have cheese on them, cheese is fattening."
Because they are thin do they think they are diet guru's? Do they think that all bodies are the same and if I am just like them I will get the same results as them? Do they think I usually sit at home eating bon bon's and watching TV? Do they think they can judge my food choices while they are eating anything and everything they want because I am a fat girl and they are not? Nope, the thin friends aren't helpful ether.
I sometimes wonder if maybe no one is really concerned with me, my life, my health, and my weight. What they tell me is ether to make them feel better that me or to make me feel worse about myself.
PS. I am not talking about my REAL friends here, I do have a group of friends that I have grown up with and we are very open and honest with each other and they are very encouraging. I am talking about my "friends" neighbors, co-workers, people I hang out with.
Also, I am in no one saying all Fat Girls and Thin Girls are like this but in my personal experience a lot of them are.